MORGANTOWN - There are only two days each calendar year on which there is not at least one game played in either Major League Baseball, the NFL, the NBA or the NHL: The days immediately before and after MLB's All-Star Game.

It is impossible to fold any normal piece of paper, no matter its size, more than seven times. Go ahead. Try it.

The earth is not round; well, at least not perfectly. Its diameter from pole to pole is 7,901 miles and at the equator 7,926 miles. In other words, it has a 25-mile midriff bulge.

By the time Jimi Hendrix performed at Woodstock and played his renowned version of the Star Spangled Banner, the crowd was less than half the estimated 500,000 of its peak. He was the closer and didn't go on until 9 a.m. the next day. He also wasn't the guy organizers wanted to close the show. Roy Rogers declined to play Happy Trails.

Really. You think I'd lie about these things? No way. I have an unimpeachable source. The Answer Dude  

knows all. (Oh, and he has a high speed Internet connection):

Dear Dude,

I'm so mad I can't see straight. I will always live and die with my beloved Mountaineers, but losing to South Florida and looking bad doing it? What's up with that? That never would have happened when Rich Rodriguez and Pat White were around. It's time to get rid of this bozo and hire a coach who can get us back to the elite. Please!

Rita R.

Detroit

Dear Rita,

You're right. Aside from those pesky losses to USF in 2006 and 2007 - both when the Mountaineers were ranked in the Top 10 - WVU just made South Florida look silly every time they played under Rodriguez. Shoot, the other time, in 2005, WVU won by two whole touchdowns, even though South Florida stuffed West Virginia's offense all night until White broke two long runs in the second half.

But, hey, things could be worse, right? West Virginia lost a close game to a team that is No. 25 in the BCS standings this week. I read where a team up in your area just lost its fourth straight game, this one by 25 points to a team that hadn't beaten another Division I team this year.

At least West Virginia doesn't have to put up with that guy.

Dear Zuppe,

Twenty game? You must kid me? I do what?

Deniz K.

Istanbul

Dear Deniz,

Here's the thing you have to understand about the American NCAA: If it involves money and/or playing AAU basketball for a certified professional agent, apparently you can repay that and make things OK (see: Kentucky's John Wall, who will fork over $800 in recruiting expenses and miss monumental UK games against Campbellsville and Morehead State). But play on a team in another country two years ago that happened to include a quasi-professional and there's nothing to repay, so you're screwed.

But hey, it could be worse. You could have done nothing wrong and lied about it briefly because you were scared you might get in trouble (see: Oklahoma State wide receiver Dez Bryant visiting Deion Sanders, which is perfectly legal). In that case your college career would have been over.

MORGANTOWN - There are only two days each calendar year on which there is not at least one game played in either Major League Baseball, the NFL, the NBA or the NHL: The days immediately before and after MLB's All-Star Game.

It is impossible to fold any normal piece of paper, no matter its size, more than seven times. Go ahead. Try it.

The earth is not round; well, at least not perfectly. Its diameter from pole to pole is 7,901 miles and at the equator 7,926 miles. In other words, it has a 25-mile midriff bulge.

By the time Jimi Hendrix performed at Woodstock and played his renowned version of the Star Spangled Banner, the crowd was less than half the estimated 500,000 of its peak. He was the closer and didn't go on until 9 a.m. the next day. He also wasn't the guy organizers wanted to close the show. Roy Rogers declined to play Happy Trails.

Really. You think I'd lie about these things? No way. I have an unimpeachable source. The Answer Dude  

knows all. (Oh, and he has a high speed Internet connection):

Dear Dude,

I'm so mad I can't see straight. I will always live and die with my beloved Mountaineers, but losing to South Florida and looking bad doing it? What's up with that? That never would have happened when Rich Rodriguez and Pat White were around. It's time to get rid of this bozo and hire a coach who can get us back to the elite. Please!

Rita R.

Detroit

Dear Rita,

You're right. Aside from those pesky losses to USF in 2006 and 2007 - both when the Mountaineers were ranked in the Top 10 - WVU just made South Florida look silly every time they played under Rodriguez. Shoot, the other time, in 2005, WVU won by two whole touchdowns, even though South Florida stuffed West Virginia's offense all night until White broke two long runs in the second half.

But, hey, things could be worse, right? West Virginia lost a close game to a team that is No. 25 in the BCS standings this week. I read where a team up in your area just lost its fourth straight game, this one by 25 points to a team that hadn't beaten another Division I team this year.

At least West Virginia doesn't have to put up with that guy.

Dear Zuppe,

Twenty game? You must kid me? I do what?

Deniz K.

Istanbul

Dear Deniz,

Here's the thing you have to understand about the American NCAA: If it involves money and/or playing AAU basketball for a certified professional agent, apparently you can repay that and make things OK (see: Kentucky's John Wall, who will fork over $800 in recruiting expenses and miss monumental UK games against Campbellsville and Morehead State). But play on a team in another country two years ago that happened to include a quasi-professional and there's nothing to repay, so you're screwed.

But hey, it could be worse. You could have done nothing wrong and lied about it briefly because you were scared you might get in trouble (see: Oklahoma State wide receiver Dez Bryant visiting Deion Sanders, which is perfectly legal). In that case your college career would have been over.

Dear Dude,

I think I've figured out this whole problem with West Virginia struggling against South Florida. I was watching the ESPN replay of the game with my bride, and USF apparently has a direct line to an information source none of the rest of us have. Personally, I think that's cheating and I'm going to write the NCAA and complain.

Bill S.

Morgantown

Dear Bill,

As usual, I had no idea what you were talking about, so I went back and watched the game very closely. And you're right. When your quarterback, Jarrett Brown, gets on the telephone between series, presumably he talks to someone called "OFFENSE'' up in the press box, or so I would imagine it says on the handset. But USF quarterback B.J. Daniels was shown on the sidelines clearly talking to someone on a phone labeled "OFFENCE.''

I'm not sure who that is, but you need to tap into that source of information, too.

Dear Dude,

Didn't you have to feel sorry for Marshall the other night? I mean, really, all we had to do was gain a yard on second-and-one for a first down and run the clock out to beat a Central Florida team that was out of timeouts. And then quarterback Brian Anderson fumbled and that was that. Didn't we deserve better?

Mark S.

Huntington

Dear Mark,

I agree. It was a shame for the players. For the coaches, though, well, not so much.

I wasn't paying real close attention because I was switching around and also watching fleet-footed Johnny Damon steal two bases on one pitch at about that time (Dude can't afford a tee wee with picture-in-picture). But for some reason I noticed some things that really bothered me.

Marshall's trying to run the clock out, right? Even if you don't convert that short-yardage play, you can still milk the clock for another 40 seconds and try again. There was only about 2:20 to play, the clock was running and those seconds tick off fast. Get this, though: On the play in which Anderson channeled his inner Joe Pisarcik, he took the snap with 15 seconds still on the play clock. What's that about?

And then with UCF on the 1 and following a Marshall timeout to get its defensive ducks all in a row, the Herd left a wide receiver completely uncovered. Not sort of alone, but uncovered. The poor guy was trying to wave his hand and get his quarterback's attention without everyone in the world seeing him.

Not that Marshall was the only team with organizational issues at the end. UCF spiked the ball with 48 seconds left and a first down at the 20. That's way too early to be just throwing away a down. And then just before the touchdown pass to the uncovered receiver, the Knights motioned a guy in his direction, which at least got someone in Marshall's defense going the right way.

Yeah, I agree, it was a shame either team lost. But it was also a shame either coach won.

Reach the Answer Dude or his alter ego, Dave Hickman, at 304-348-1734 or dphickm...@aol.com.