Faced with problems raising her biracial daughter in conservative central Illinois, Nell Fleming joined a support group of mothers who shared similar experiences. She wound up leading the group. Now, Fleming is starting a similar program here.
CHARLESTON, W.Va. -- Faced with problems raising her biracial daughter in conservative central Illinois, Nell Fleming joined a support group of mothers who shared similar experiences. She wound up leading the group.
Now, Fleming is starting a similar program here. The Women of Biracial Children Support Group will hold its first meeting Jan. 18 in the YWCA's O'Connor-Autz Room.
When the Y hired Fleming as its racial justice coordinator last fall, the support group was one of the first things that came to mind, she said Wednesday.
She started sending e-mails and hanging fliers to promote the group last month, concentrating on social service agencies, boys and girls clubs, doctors' offices and black-owned businesses.
"It's been difficult because places like Wal-Mart don't have community bulletin boards anymore. Kroger let me hang one, outside on a pop machine."
While hanging fliers, Fleming was often asked why mothers of biracial children need support. The question itself helps illustrate the need. "If you don't know why we need support, you haven't walked in our shoes."
In the monthly meetings, she expects to discuss issues like identity development, neighborhood and school diversity, hair care and dealing with racist family members.
Fleming can speak from experience. As she and her husband prepared for childbirth, they got plenty of family advice.
She grew up in southern Illinois -- "coal country," she says -- and met her Chicago-born husband in the university town of Bloomington.
The birth of Ronnell, now 7 1/2, was planned, she said. My husband and I definitely wanted to have child, although we waited about 10 years. We received a lot of advice."
CHARLESTON, W.Va. -- Faced with problems raising her biracial daughter in conservative central Illinois, Nell Fleming joined a support group of mothers who shared similar experiences. She wound up leading the group.
Now, Fleming is starting a similar program here. The Women of Biracial Children Support Group will hold its first meeting Jan. 18 in the YWCA's O'Connor-Autz Room.
When the Y hired Fleming as its racial justice coordinator last fall, the support group was one of the first things that came to mind, she said Wednesday.
She started sending e-mails and hanging fliers to promote the group last month, concentrating on social service agencies, boys and girls clubs, doctors' offices and black-owned businesses.
"It's been difficult because places like Wal-Mart don't have community bulletin boards anymore. Kroger let me hang one, outside on a pop machine."
While hanging fliers, Fleming was often asked why mothers of biracial children need support. The question itself helps illustrate the need. "If you don't know why we need support, you haven't walked in our shoes."
In the monthly meetings, she expects to discuss issues like identity development, neighborhood and school diversity, hair care and dealing with racist family members.
Fleming can speak from experience. As she and her husband prepared for childbirth, they got plenty of family advice.
She grew up in southern Illinois -- "coal country," she says -- and met her Chicago-born husband in the university town of Bloomington.
The birth of Ronnell, now 7 1/2, was planned, she said. My husband and I definitely wanted to have child, although we waited about 10 years. We received a lot of advice."
Giving birth to a mixed-race child was a big issue. "We had family members urging us to consider what we were doing. We had family members telling us to move out west to a ranch far away from other people."
Things improved when they moved to Charleston three years ago, Fleming said. "I personally had a more difficult time in central Illinois than I did here. I was surprised to find such a welcoming community here in Charleston. The culture here, it's like home."
Not that things are perfect. "Take the Reynolds family in Montgomery [who were abused by police]. Their experience is vastly different from mine, and yet they're 20 minutes away.
"Knowing that can happen, it keeps you on edge. Living in West Virginia, we've had excellent experiences, excellent schools. But again, every single mother you meet has their own experience, their own neighborhood."
Fathers will not be welcome at the support group meetings, Fleming said. "In Bloomington we had some discussions about that. Some of the mothers wanted to involve their husbands." When they tried that, "We lost a group of single women, divorced moms. They didn't feel comfortable speaking their minds in front of other men.
"If people want a family situation, there's another group called Swirl," she said.
Fleming said she has already spoken to several mothers interested in joining.
"What this group becomes depends on what they need. We won't know until they show up. It's going to be group-run."
The Women of Biracial Children Support Group will meet from 6 to 7 p.m. on the third Monday each month. Childcare is available on site for $5 per hour per child. For information, call Nell Fleming at 309-825-9133, e-mail nflem...@ywcacharleston.org or visit www.ywcacharleston.org.
Reach Jim Balow at ba...@wvgazette.com or 304-348-5102.
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Vito, tell me, please, since you used that term to debate someone about this subject, why does the fact small percentage more white women marry black men than black women marry white men bother you enough to reference the statistics below?
Because the fact is that blacks comprise only 3.3 percent of WV's population. So even if you preferred to date only women who have approximately the same skin color as yours, if you're white, then there still would be plenty of Caucasian women even in the unlikely event that every adult Black male in WV was either married or engaged.
On the other hand if you're a Black person living in WV, and you preferred dating someone who had approximately your own skin color who is an unmarried adult, then your options are severely limited.
What your statistic indicates, is that generally speaking, Black women are apparently wise enough to be wary of the high incidence of white supremacist jerks lurking among the US male population
The bible scriptures cannot be used to convince the concerned public anymore. Regards , Jayhawk
"But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; and base things of the world, and things which are despised;hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are: that no flesh should glory in his presence....I Corinthians 1:27-31.
To me, Jesus has made it clear that His house would be a house of prayer for all nations, all people. Love for God is our first priority;love for our fellowman flows from that. I feel that we must walk together in covenant unity with the body of Christ. Also, we must reconciled across gender,ethnic, generational, and denominational lines in order to obtain it.